Ultrasound Update and Trusting in God's Plan

So, I lie here with a contraction and heart monitor on my belly before my ultrasound to check fluid and Asher's progress. I feel a little more anxious today as James left this morning to go back to work. The blessing is he is only 20 minutes away, but it feels so different without him. He was like my supportive cushion. I felt everything would be just fine because he is tight beside me and near. However, I am not alone. God and Josh along with all the Angels and Saints and your prayers are right here with me. I opened up a Bible Quote book my sister gave me to listen  to God this morning and this quote was perfect... "Cast all your anxiety on Jesus because he cares for you". It reminded me again to stay strong and be free from worry because God is right here protecting Asher and I.

Just got back from ultrasound. The fluid pockets surrounding Asher are mainly up above him, as it is more common to have less below with it being more likely to leak. Asher is still breech, but he had a great heart rate of 144. The biggest fluid pocket she found was 1.2 cm, which has went down since last time, but that is just one pocket. Next week if God wills it, they will measure the complete amount of fluid around Asher. To us, any amount of fluid around him is a blessing! We got a cute profile pic of him today with his legs above his head, just like Easton was in me. The tech also gave me more hope by telling me that she had a woman come in early like me, with small fluid pockets. And make it to 34 weeks! Everyones story is different, but I know God is blessing Asher and us each day, and He knows the best plan!

To make the clock tick by a little faster, my plan today is begin writing my maid of honor speech for my sister's wedding. It is hard to believe that the wedding is a little over 5 weeks away already. I don't know if I will be there in person to give the speech, but my sister knows my speech will be delivered to her no matter what because I want her to know how much she means to me. I couldn't imagine life we without her, and I know it is a special moment that I may miss, but my speech will be said. So, I pray God delivers the words I want to say today and throughout this week!

This experience has made me realize that you can have all of these events planned, but sometimes God has a different plan for us, one that is better even though it is hard to comprehend at the time. My summer plan was to have a schedule for Easton where we would learn a letter in his name, a color, a number, and some sensory skills each week. We would make a fun snack together, go to the library, visit the zoo, play outside, watch movies, and just spend time together. I would work with him on potty training, which I can't thank our parents enough for taking on that task! During our down time, we would prepare Asher's nursery. I planned on getting my maid of honor dress altered in mid June and couldn't wait to receive Easton's ring bearer outfit on the porch. I was excited to walk in my sister's wedding and watch her happiest day come true. I also looked forward to sleeping in in the mornings while I had summer break, if Easton wouldn't wake me up first. Yes, I had a lot of plans, but they weren't on God's plans for me. I can sit here and wish they were, or accept that God has me on bed rest in this situation for a reason. I have chosen to accept it as God's will and know there was a special reason for this. This experience doesn't involve teaching my son the alphabet, numbers, or colors in a scheduled routine, but has taught me so much. It has given me more patience, time to be with God, time to share my stories and thoughts with you, time with my husbabd, family, and friends. It has taught me that life isn't always easy and doesn't always go as planned. You must take day by day and cherish each because it is God's plan that he directs us to if we listen. He knew Asher needed my rest to grow stronger, and Asher has a purpose in this world, so this is where he led me to be to make His will happen. I will look back on this experience and be so grateful. It may seem like a lot of time ahead of me, but when I look back on it, it will feel like nothing. It will just be a moment I remember as God giving James and I to get Asher strong and fight for him because he matters to us!

Thank you for your continued prayers! They warm my heart, and I can feel them around me. James and I wouldn't be as strong as we are without you, God, Josh, and all of the Angels and Saints. Let us continue to unite as prayer warriors for Asher in this fight, as God leads us to His beautiful grace for Asher. God, You are beautiful in all Your ways. There are times where Your plan seems hard to understand, but with faith we know that You always have a reason and know what is best. You are our greatest hero and friend. We lift up this fight for Asher to You as we trust in Your amazing path and will. We love You above all things. Amen.